100th100.in IN CELEBRATION OF SACHIN TENDULKAR'S 100TH 100!

On a day when the Union Budget and Sachin Tendulkar’s 100th century hogged all the limelight, an incident which went completely unnoticed was the kidnapping of former Indian cricketer and commentator Ravi Shastri. Sources say that a group of die-hard Tendulkar fans had been lurking outside Shastri’s residence, which had been bugged.

The moment Tendulkar crossed 80, Shastri, in his characteristic tone, said: “Justtttt get the feeling, Ritu…”
Before he could complete his cliché, the fans broke into the Shastri residence, pounced on him and immediately plastered his mouth. The cricket fans, who were armed with knives, carried Shastri into their car and drove away. When they stopped at a TV showroom, they saw Tendulkar was batting on 99.

They waited a while to see the historic feat being accomplished.

The chief kidnapper then said: “Yay! It is this master plaster which saved our master blaster!” and removed the plaster.

Shastri was freed and given a bottle of water on his request. To their surprise, Shastri didn’t open it to drink water and instead held it in his hand to announce, “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve had a historic day of cricket today. Over 100 centuries have been scored by a champion and it can only be said that the game of cricket is the…“. He was cut short yet again by the same fans who beat him up black and blue with hockey sticks and iron rods.

One of the kidnappers was heard saying, “It was all okay in the beginning yaar. Shastri was just telling his wife things like the atmosphere is electric, the weather is just what the doctor ordered, that went to the boundary like a tracer-bullet etc. But as expected, when Tendukar crossed 80, he began to say the dangerous, disastrous, doom-spelling line –Just get the feeling.

He has always succeeded in getting Tendulkar out by mentioning that line, yaar. However, this time, we were careful and didn’t let it happen. But after this historic century, we thought at least today he would declare Tendulkar the winner. But no, even today, he went on to say that the game of cricket is the winner! That’s so unfair, na? That’s why we had to beat him up.”

However, after Shastri recollected how he had been at the non-striker’s end when Tendulkar scored some of his centuries in the early phase of his career, the fans deeply regretted their uncivil behaviour and took Shastri to a medical practitioner.

“Just what the doctor ordered,” moaned Shastri, before passing out in a state of delirious happiness.

(Reproduced from http://www.theunrealtimes.com/. The UnReal Times is one of the top websites for satire, spoof, parody and humour in India)

Source: Satire: Shastri kidnapped ahead of Sachin Tendulkar's 100th ton; released later! | Cricket News & Articles | CricketCountry.com